Whether you're gainfully employed but looking for the next right opportunity for you, or you're in career transition, job searching is hard. Here are three unfortunate job searching truths that can help you manage your mindset and emotions as you work through the ups and downs of this process. 

When you're a hiring manager, you have a ton going on, and only one of those things is hiring a new person. You're still trying to manage your team, meet deadlines, troubleshoot customer problems, and juggle all the people you're considering for your open position. In an interview, when one candidate asks about the hiring process, you tell them you should know who will move on to the next steps in the process "by the end of this week"--and at the time, you believe that is a reasonable deadline. Then there is a software release with a bug that causes three meetings to be scheduled with big clients, or someone ends up out on sick leave unexpectedly, or your child has to be picked up from daycare with the flu. Friday comes and goes, and getting in touch with a candidate falls off your radar until the next week. 

Meanwhile, as a job seeker, you put a note on your calendar that you'll know one way or another by Friday. Then you analyze every syllable you uttered in the interview, hoping you didn't say anything awful. You rethink a facial expression you interpreted as approving and wonder if it really was that at all. You suffer through Saturday, Sunday, and Monday, secretly worrying that you will never find another job. Ever. 

Instead of spiraling, take action to get you closer to your goals.
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After the interview, email the hiring manager a thank you message and consider sending them a LinkedIn connection request. Put a note on your calendar for a few days after the hiring manager said they would contact you. Reach out to them at that time, including a few pleasantries, reiterating your interest in the role, and asking for an update.

Will you get the job? It's hard to tell. Either way, you did your part. Remind yourself that you won't get every job you apply for, and reflect to see what you can learn from it. At the very least, pat yourself on the back that you didn't over-follow up (which is often worse than not following up at all), and be sure to focus on more than one job opportunity at a time.

In addition, network with three more people and apply for three more jobs.

Inevitably as a job searcher, you run across it. THE job. It's the one you know is meant to be yours. It's perfect--easy commute, a great title, the go-to company, exactly what you are qualified (and want) to do. In your head, you think--this is MY job. You picture your new business cards, where you'll park, and how you'll introduce yourself as the "Director of Awesomeness" for this perfect company. If you're still working, you may be dreaming about the day you hand in your notice--or get excited knowing you won't have to finish a dreaded project because you'll be elsewhere. You think--why should I even bother applying for anything else because this one is SO my job!

Except, well, it's not actually your job yet. You're looking at it and seeing yourself in it, but it's not real. You don't work there. No one is sending you a paycheck for it. They don't even know your name yet. You may very well still work at your company in a few months when the project you're not excited about is due. While this MAY be the job you eventually get, it's not a done deal yet.

You know what else? It may not end up being your job. Apply for that job--even work hard to get it. Know, though, that you may end up not even getting called in for an interview. This doesn't mean you're not still an amazing professional with valuable qualifications. Remember, there are always many things going on when companies hire. There may be an internal candidate, a previous coworker of the hiring manager, someone who has a referral from a college friend, or someone who has even slightly more of a qualification that didn't make that job posting. 

Instead of spiraling, take action to get you closer to your goals.

Whenever you fall in love with a job or think of something as "your job,” make an extra effort to apply for additional jobs--or at least game out what happens if you do not get the job. If the job you see yourself in works out, great. If not, you're still working towards your ultimate goal of finding a new role (complete with a paycheck), whichever job that might be. 

In addition, network with three more people and apply for three more jobs

Applying for jobs is a process. Looking back at my records, I have typically applied for between 40 and 100 jobs when I've been in career transition. It's easy to get discouraged. If you're working and looking for something else, you might be more selective in your applications and feel especially attached to an opening you see. Remember, not every personal referral, application, or interview will lead to an offer.

Again--sometimes you apply and hear back a fat lot of nothing. Sometimes, you might get a quick rejection from a job only to see it reposted a week later. In those cases, it can be hard to see that they don't even have a good candidate, but they know it's not going to be me. That one smarts.

It's also hard when you interview for a role multiple times only to hear that you didn't get the job. Even though they genuinely liked you, you didn't get it. Maybe you were a close second, perhaps they went with an internal candidate, or they ended up not filling the position. There is so much rejection in the job search process that you’ll inevitably feel sad and like maybe there is no hope for you finding the right next job for you.

Instead of spiraling, take action to get you closer to your goals. 

At the end of the day, though, you only need one job, and one organization to tell you “Yes.” You only need one place where you and the employer agree to work together. Sometimes, it's helpful to remind yourself that all those no answers get you to the one yes you need. The trick is that you don't know which one will be that yes. You have to keep on keeping on until you find it.

In addition, network with three more people and apply for three more jobs.

By Brenda L. Peterson, The Layoff Lady

Some days will be amazing. Within a half hour of waking up, you receive an invitation to do a phone screen, notice another hiring manager accepted your LinkedIn connection request, and receive a message from a recruiter for a role that looks promising. Everything is going great for you. Hearing that good news fills you with hope about the future. You feel appreciated, valued, and worthwhile.

​Soon, you’re updating your budget, making that overdue phone call, and cleaning your whole kitchen. You use that extra burst of energy to start preparing for tomorrow’s phone screen. Today, you are productivity personified.

Then there are the other days. You check your email and read, “We will not be moving forward with your application,” then move on to “We regret to inform you,” then finish up with, “This position is no longer available.” You’re not even out of bed, and you already heard you weren’t good enough for three jobs you really wanted.

Now, all that good news from the previous day seems irrelevant. Your email has become a scary place where everyone is mean. You hop onto LinkedIn to look for new jobs. While looking at job listings, you fixate on the one or two preferred qualifications you don’t have. You start to customize a resume for one job, then stare at your screen, trying to figure out why anyone would bother hiring you. Now, you're not going to have it in you to be a high achiever. 

After a three-rejection morning, you may feel like a failure, and everything is hopeless. Despite how it feels right then, you are not lazy, a loser, or a failure. Instead, you have probably been going too hard for too long and have little to show for it yet. 

In addition, you have probably been relying on the overly simplistic getting-things-done strategies people often bluster about. If your only plan for success involves hammering away, powering through, or pulling yourself up by your bootstraps, you will have problems. It’s an excellent time to remind yourself that bucking/soldiering/cowboying up is not a long-term sustainable strategy. It is a short-term fix you can use occasionally when you have no other options. Making that once-in-a-while solution your go-to move will leave you irritable, burned out, and feeling like the failure you most certainly are not.

Yes, you are trying to find a job. Yes, you are trying to keep your finances in check. You also need to be able to continue to keep going sustainably so you can persevere as long as your career transition requires. You won’t be able to push yourself beyond your limits consistently for very long. Given that many job searches last between a few weeks and several months, you will need to find a way to sustain the effort you’ll need to achieve your job search goals. 

There is an art to writing a helpful task list. This basic self-care list includes items that are valuable, easy to achieve, and can be checked off definitely. You can also update these lists to reflect what makes the most sense to you in your life. This is not your "I have accomplished miracles" list. Instead, this is your "I did the basic things I need to stay well so I can prioritize to keep going" list. 

Morning

• Brush teeth.
• Take vitamins/medication.
• Shower.
• Drink a glass of water.

Afternoon

• Eat lunch, including a fruit or vegetable.
• Drink a glass of water.
• Move for 30 minutes.
• Go outside for 10 minutes.

Evening

• Eat dinner, including a fruit or vegetable. 
• Drink a glass of water.
• Stretch for 10 minutes.
• Brush your teeth.

This is a good starting point for a basic self-care list. If moving for 30 minutes is too much for you right now, make it 10. If making your bed helps you feel better, consider adding that to your morning list. If you do a load of laundry daily and put it away, fit that in where it makes sense. If you take your vitamins before bed, do that.

​Do what you need to to do make it yours. This basic self-care list will help you feel better on your hardest days. On an easier day, you'll breeze through these items with no problem and move on to conquering the world.

By Brenda L. Peterson, The Layoff Lady

Whether you are actively searching for a new role, or just have an eye out for a new position, it's important to do your homework. It's important to remember that the company is not just interviewing you for a position. You are also interviewing the company to make sure they meet your requirements for what you want and need in an employer.

When researching, remind yourself of the value of seeking information from multiple viewpoints. You'll gather different, yet often equally valuable, information from the company website, news sources, online review sites, and speaking with individuals who have direct experience working for the organization. 

Let's examine why, when, and how to conduct your vetting process.

When researching a company, start with the online sites that the company runs. This includes their company website, their LinkedIn company page, and their other social media presences. Your main goals include finding out more about the company and the logistics of working there to help you decide if the company seems like a good fit for you and is aligned with your career goals. 

Here are a few ideas on what to look for: 

• Is their online presence complete and professional? Is the information current?
• What details do they have online about their value proposition for employees? Do they mention employee perks, benefits, or their company culture?
• What industry are they in? How many people work there?
• ​What are their working arrangements?
• Have they won any awards?
• How are they active in the community?
• On LinkedIn,  are you connected with any of their employees?
• What is their address? If applicable, do they have office locations near you? For a possible remote position, is anyone else in the state in which you live employed there?​ 
• Is there recent company report on the website? How have their financials been recently?

Once you have looked at company-run sites, it's helpful to do an online search to see how and when they are showing up in the news. You're looking for good and not-so-good information on the organization, as reported in the news. To do this, you could type in the company's full name and the word news, all in quotes, in your favorite search engine. Alternatively, you could type in the company's name in quotes, then click the news link on your favorite search engine. 

Here are a few ideas on what to look for: 
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• Company accomplishments and recent awards.
• Leadership and key staffing changes.
• Good works in the community.
• Activities or events they sponsored.
• Any legal news or actions.
• Previous or planned layoffs.
• Announcements about changes in company structure or ownership.

After looking at the news, it's helpful to look at online reviews for the company. Remember, often, when people write reviews, they are either ecstatic or disgruntled--sometimes without much in between. For comparison, think about how you would rate a recent employer based on the best day you ever had at work there as compared to your worst day at work--and that both were valid in those moments.

Here are a few places to look that are focused on gathering and sharing opinions about organizations:
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• For general impressions of the company, visit The Better Business Bureau.
• To see history or plans for layoffs, search for WARN notices and your state.
• To hear what current or past employees have to say, visit Glassdoor.com.
• To hear what current or past employees have to say, visit Indeed.com.
• Search for review sites of the company's products and services.

In addition to the news, reports on websites, and anonymous feedback, reaching out to people with experience at a given company for additional insights is also valuable. This is where you can leverage your professional network to connect with people who have firsthand experience. 

Here are a few ideas for how to find out more: 
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• On LinkedIn, look at the company's current employees. Search those employees for someone who is one of your current connections. Reach out to that person to ask about their experience working with the company. 
• On LinkedIn, look at the company's current employees. See if you have a second-degree connection with any of the company's current employees. Reach out to that person to ask if they are willing to introduce you to someone at that organization.
• Contact key members of professional organizations where you are a member. Ask if anyone there has insight on the company or knows someone who does. As for either an introduction or any insights they have to share. 

What else do you do to research a company? Include your ideas in the comments. 

By Brenda L. Peterson, The Layoff Lady

Life is challenging when nothing in particular is happening. When you're going through a job change (especially one you didn't plan), it's even harder. While I'm a fan of self-reliance, I also know the value of finding people who want to support you and letting them do it. You're not weak for needing people. You are smart for planning ahead for what you will need.

I have been through a post-layoff job transition 7 times, and it is difficult each and every time. There is the fear that it will just never end, and you'll be drifting for eternity trying to find paid work where you can pay your bills--much less in a job you want. You worry that you'll have to settle for something that may be even worse than the worst job you've ever had. You also worry that you'll run out of money and not be able to pay your bills and lose everything you own and everyone you've ever loved. While your rational mind knows this is all pretty unlikely, there will be moments when everything seems hopeless. That's where your support network comes in. 

No matter how resilient and downright badass you are, doing this alone makes it way harder. 

As an extra added bonus, people want to help you! I'm always inspired by all the people who came out of the woodwork to check on me, told me about an open position, thanked me for helping them once upon a time, or offered to refer me for a role. Everyone has struggled with something at one time or another, and someone has helped them. Let other people help you. 

It also takes a village to get you through a career transition. Relying on one person for everything is all kinds of stressful. Know that people want to help, and it's a matter of figuring out what you need, letting people know, and reaching out to people as needed. Going through a job search is challenging, even in the best of circumstances.

Here's a starter list of the types of help you may need during your job transition. More specifically, here is some of what I needed. Use this as a starting point and add details as it helps you:
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• ​Emotional Support: You'll have all the feelings. Figure out who you can talk to about what. Sometimes you'll laugh, sometimes you'll cry, sometimes you'll vent, and on the most trying days, maybe all of the above. 
• Communication: Just telling people what is up can be draining--because people. Realize, too, that your telling them about your situation may result in them inadvertently trying to allay their fears that the same thing will happen to them. Find a friend who can help you spread whatever news there is to convey. Telephone. Telegraph. Tell a Karla. Find those people who love to connect with others (and even share some of the same social circles) and enlist their help.  
• Sounding Board: When you're making big decisions--or doing something you don't do very often, having someone to talk things through will is mission critical. Personally, I don't even always need my sounding board people to say much--just to sit there and listen (or at least just not talk over me) as I talk myself into or out of the idea I'm considering. There is so much value to writing or talking through ideas as you choose your next steps.
• Logistical Support: Sometimes, you'll need a hand figuring things out. Maybe it's having someone to watch your kids for a bit so you can have a phone interview. Perhaps it's help with a ride if you're having car trouble. Whatever it is, it may seem small to them, but it'll solve a problem for you. 
• Fun: There will be many, many times when you just need a distraction. Watching a movie. Having coffee. Talking about non-job search related things. Having a conversation where you don't have to be "on" and can just chat with someone. It doesn't have to be elaborate. It just has to be a welcome break from all those "shoulds" to be something other than a job-searching human.
• Cheerleader: You also need someone to give you a pep talk. Whether it's someone who'll send you a quick "You've got this!" text or someone to remind you to take a deep breath and tell them your remarkable story, remember that encouragement is essential. They can also help you celebrate successes and remind you of your innate value when you're struggling.
• Accountability: You'll also need someone to help you keep on track. It may be as easy as them asking if you applied for that job you talked about. Or asking you if you updated your resume like you said you would do.­­­ Create the positive peer pressure to help you follow through on what you need to do.
• New Ideas: There is a certain amount of trial and error when looking for a new job. Whether it's optimizing LinkedIn, figuring out how to network with new people, finding the best way to position your work experience, or where to find jobs, there's a lot to learn. Whether you tap into someone who works in that industry, or a hiring manager, or a resume writer, figuring out how to be a more effective job searcher is useful. 
• Connectors: Each of us has people in our lives who seem to know all the things and/or all the people. Let them help you connect with the right person, opportunity, or idea at the right time.

When it comes to help, I start with my inner circle--close friends and family. I'm also sure to widen my support team beyond them, too.

I also move beyond that immediate group. I interact with my LinkedIn connections. I tap into online groups including job search groups, The White Box Club, and even LinkedIn groups focusing on networking or a content area (like sales enablement).

I interact with in-person membership groups like ATD or the Omaha OD Network. Or I seek out non-work connections through social Meetup groups or activities. Sometimes, I just spend time in coffee shops to indirectly interact with other people. It's a matter of figuring out what you need and finding a person to help.

Know, too, that there will be times when you need to straight up reach out to someone because you need help. Each person will have their areas of interest and expertise, so be sure to keep that in mind when asking for help.

It's helpful to consider who you might contact for different needs. Here are a few cases when I was job searching and I reached out to people to ask for help:
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• Before a job interview, I would text my daughter to let her know I had an interview. She woudl then text back encouraging words and follow up afterwards to see how it all went. 
• If I need non-job search social interaction, I'd reach out to my former "lunch ladies" coworkers with a link to my Calendly and ask if they're up for a catch-up conversation (then they would pick a time for us to chat.)
• If was having a rough day, I'll reach out to my best friend to talk a bit. 
• If was unsure if my resume was clear, I'll contact a former coworker to give it a look and make suggestions on what I could do better.
• If I wanted to talk shop but not directly job searching, I'd contact a LinkedIn connection I hadn't chatted with in a while and see if they were up for a virtual coffee meeting. I got to have a fulfilling interaction with another person and glean a few professional insights, too.