Creating Your Career Transition Support Team

By Brenda L. Peterson, The Layoff Lady

Don't Go It Alone

Life is challenging when nothing in particular is happening. When you're going through a job change (especially one you didn't plan), it's even harder. While I'm a fan of self-reliance, I also know the value of finding people who want to support you and letting them do it. You're not weak for needing people. You are smart for planning ahead for what you will need.

You Need Help Because This is Hard

I have been through a post-layoff job transition 7 times, and it is difficult each and every time. There is the fear that it will just never end, and you'll be drifting for eternity trying to find paid work where you can pay your bills--much less in a job you want. You worry that you'll have to settle for something that may be even worse than the worst job you've ever had. You also worry that you'll run out of money and not be able to pay your bills and lose everything you own and everyone you've ever loved. While your rational mind knows this is all pretty unlikely, there will be moments when everything seems hopeless. That's where your support network comes in. 

No matter how resilient and downright badass you are, doing this alone makes it way harder. 

People Want to Help You: Make Sure to Let Them

As an extra added bonus, people want to help you! I'm always inspired by all the people who came out of the woodwork to check on me, told me about an open position, thanked me for helping them once upon a time, or offered to refer me for a role. Everyone has struggled with something at one time or another, and someone has helped them. Let other people help you. 

Building Your Team

It also takes a village to get you through a career transition. Relying on one person for everything is all kinds of stressful. Know that people want to help, and it's a matter of figuring out what you need, letting people know, and reaching out to people as needed. Going through a job search is challenging, even in the best of circumstances.

Types of Help You Need

Here's a starter list of the types of help you may need during your job transition. More specifically, here is some of what I needed. Use this as a starting point and add details as it helps you:
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• ​Emotional Support: You'll have all the feelings. Figure out who you can talk to about what. Sometimes you'll laugh, sometimes you'll cry, sometimes you'll vent, and on the most trying days, maybe all of the above. 
• Communication: Just telling people what is up can be draining--because people. Realize, too, that your telling them about your situation may result in them inadvertently trying to allay their fears that the same thing will happen to them. Find a friend who can help you spread whatever news there is to convey. Telephone. Telegraph. Tell a Karla. Find those people who love to connect with others (and even share some of the same social circles) and enlist their help.  
• Sounding Board: When you're making big decisions--or doing something you don't do very often, having someone to talk things through will is mission critical. Personally, I don't even always need my sounding board people to say much--just to sit there and listen (or at least just not talk over me) as I talk myself into or out of the idea I'm considering. There is so much value to writing or talking through ideas as you choose your next steps.
• Logistical Support: Sometimes, you'll need a hand figuring things out. Maybe it's having someone to watch your kids for a bit so you can have a phone interview. Perhaps it's help with a ride if you're having car trouble. Whatever it is, it may seem small to them, but it'll solve a problem for you. 
• Fun: There will be many, many times when you just need a distraction. Watching a movie. Having coffee. Talking about non-job search related things. Having a conversation where you don't have to be "on" and can just chat with someone. It doesn't have to be elaborate. It just has to be a welcome break from all those "shoulds" to be something other than a job-searching human.
• Cheerleader: You also need someone to give you a pep talk. Whether it's someone who'll send you a quick "You've got this!" text or someone to remind you to take a deep breath and tell them your remarkable story, remember that encouragement is essential. They can also help you celebrate successes and remind you of your innate value when you're struggling.
• Accountability: You'll also need someone to help you keep on track. It may be as easy as them asking if you applied for that job you talked about. Or asking you if you updated your resume like you said you would do.­­­ Create the positive peer pressure to help you follow through on what you need to do.
• New Ideas: There is a certain amount of trial and error when looking for a new job. Whether it's optimizing LinkedIn, figuring out how to network with new people, finding the best way to position your work experience, or where to find jobs, there's a lot to learn. Whether you tap into someone who works in that industry, or a hiring manager, or a resume writer, figuring out how to be a more effective job searcher is useful. 
• Connectors: Each of us has people in our lives who seem to know all the things and/or all the people. Let them help you connect with the right person, opportunity, or idea at the right time.

Who Can Help

When it comes to help, I start with my inner circle--close friends and family. I'm also sure to widen my support team beyond them, too.

I also move beyond that immediate group. I interact with my LinkedIn connections. I tap into online groups including job search groups, The White Box Club, and even LinkedIn groups focusing on networking or a content area (like sales enablement).

I interact with in-person membership groups like ATD or the Omaha OD Network. Or I seek out non-work connections through social Meetup groups or activities. Sometimes, I just spend time in coffee shops to indirectly interact with other people. It's a matter of figuring out what you need and finding a person to help.

Asking for Help

Know, too, that there will be times when you need to straight up reach out to someone because you need help. Each person will have their areas of interest and expertise, so be sure to keep that in mind when asking for help.

It's helpful to consider who you might contact for different needs. Here are a few cases when I was job searching and I reached out to people to ask for help:
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• Before a job interview, I would text my daughter to let her know I had an interview. She woudl then text back encouraging words and follow up afterwards to see how it all went. 
• If I need non-job search social interaction, I'd reach out to my former "lunch ladies" coworkers with a link to my Calendly and ask if they're up for a catch-up conversation (then they would pick a time for us to chat.)
• If was having a rough day, I'll reach out to my best friend to talk a bit. 
• If was unsure if my resume was clear, I'll contact a former coworker to give it a look and make suggestions on what I could do better.
• If I wanted to talk shop but not directly job searching, I'd contact a LinkedIn connection I hadn't chatted with in a while and see if they were up for a virtual coffee meeting. I got to have a fulfilling interaction with another person and glean a few professional insights, too. 

Learn More

• ​The White Box Club​ on Meetup
• The Layoff Lady's Ultimate Guide To Answering The Question, "I Just Got Laid Off--Now What Do I Do?"​
• The Layoff Lady Book: Seven Lessons From Seven Layoffs: A Guide​